Curiosity is the beginning of knowledge, but understanding is the beginning of wisdom – Debasish Mridha MD
I made a whopper of a mistake yesterday. Actually, it was made a year ago and came to light yesterday. Habitually I would rake myself over the coals and obsess about it. Then defend myself with excuses for making the mistake, something like if you had my circumstances, you would have made the mistake too.
Then, of course, this would open the gateway for numbing behavior, usually more food than my body needs. Imagine a big spiral heading downwards into a big plate of nachos.
How do we break this trance of habitual thinking followed by habitual behavior?
Curiosity and Understanding
Knowing that the brain is conditioned for survival, I begin to see that my thoughts are of a protective nature and not helpful. For whatever reason, it doesn’t matter why, I reflexively diminish myself when a mistake happens. As if I should not have this human experience. As if I'm in control of what experiences appear.
The brain’s one and only is me me me. It is extremely interested in itself. It would narrate the mistake something like this:
Oh no I made a mistake! How can I fix it? What does it mean about me? What will people think about me? I wonder if something bad will happen…and on and on.
Causing my chest and shoulders to stiffen, it feels like I put a heavy armored vest on. Tight as a drum.
The common denominator is about me and how I’m affected by the mistake.
With curiosity and the openness, it brings, I saw to take the “me” out of the narration.
A mistake was made. Full stop.
Oh well then, how do we go about correcting the mistake?
Back in the flow of life. It's normal to have a lot of fear-based thinking, that is what a brain does. It's life-changing to know that we don't have to be all that interested in them. When we are less interested in the content of our brains, our relationship to our thoughts change.